Experiencing "Tower Moments" When Working With Demons

One shared thing about tarot, Satanism/Luciferianism, and demonalatry is that they largely began in the 20th century. I say "largely" because there's some historical wiggle room, such as the debatably Satanist 19th century German order Fraternitas Saturni1 and the fact that tarot was based off the mid-15th century Italian playing card game tarocchini. However, within the 20th century leading up to current times, these spiritual practices exist in tandem and backdrop to one another, and so they converge upon each other in fascinating ways. That's how tarot language, such as "Tower Moment" often finds its way into Luciferian and demonalatry spaces.

For those who don't know, The Tower in the (Rider-)Waite-Smith system—which is the foundation that most modern tarot decks are based off—is considered one of the more foreboding cards. Its presence in a reading usually indicates that the person may undergo a collapse of structures in their life. This can be an internal process, such as their expectations or perspective on an area in their lives, or an external issue, such as a lost job, friend group, or anticipated achievement. Notably, the latter can often lead to the former and is considered the more fearsome of the two. Like a malefic transit or chart element in astrology, a "Tower Moment" is less a specific set of events and more of a way of naming and contextualizing a commonplace experience wherein people endure unfortunate periods in their lives. It's further characterized by these people feeling (understandable) distress and instability in response to the events. "Tower Moments" are, in contrary to their name, not always momentary and tend to be life altering.

That said: this does not mean every time you pull The Tower that you are about to experience a "Tower Moment." Depending on the question and the context, which is your life, it may just be something you view as unpleasant. One time, I asked my spirits what would happen if I bought a new mattress and got The Tower. I bought the mattress. It was a great mattress and I miss it. However, it was the first mattress I bought for myself after separating from my ex-spouse, which was definitely part of one of my most significant "Tower Moments."

In online demonalatry (the worship of demons versus demonology, which is merely the study and potential working with demons) spaces, reports by practitioners about them experiencing "Tower Moments" are common. Some demons supposedly bring Tower Moments more customarily than others, such as one of my closer spirits Belial. I did ask him about this prior to writing the blog post, but got one of those silences that infer, "You need to make meaning out of that yourself." With further prodding, however, he did lightly suggest that maybe if a human could see themselves as a brick in a tower and they wanted to be moved from their place and put on top of the Tower—let's just say as a metaphor for wanting higher status, which is one of the things Belial offers—in the process of being lifted they might perceive all the bricks that had previously surrounded them as falling away.

Similarly to pulling The Tower card, working with Belial does not necessarily mean you will experience a "Tower Moment." Plenty of his devotees push back on this narrative, having never experienced such extreme discomfort while in relationship to him. I concur that I have yet to have difficulty with Belial, although he has warned me that in the future there will be circumstances in which he is going to work me hard in order that I achieve my dreams and help the most people possible. In the meantime, we mostly drink together, chat, and have sex.

At first, I really thought I hadn't gone through a "Tower Moment" at all since starting my Luciferian journey. Then, upon having the idea for this blog post, I had to rethink what that meant. Upon reflection, I realized I have actually lost a lot since I gave myself over to Lucifer last year. I moved out of southern California, where I truly believed I was going to live the rest of my life, and lost all ideas of what my life was going to be like in relation. I lost my dog, to whom being a parent to I had always partially anchored my identity. More recently, having experienced what it is to be truly fully loved for the first time through Lucifer, I am less tolerant toward people who mistreat me and have kicked a number of friends out of my life as a result.

I hadn't initially named this as a "Tower Moment" because with Lucifer's guidance it has all felt more like a controlled fall rather than a complete drop into the abyss. I understand I was encourage to move by him and Astaroth because they wanted me to live somewhere safer for me as a trans person as well as an environment more sustainable for family planning. Laddie, unfortunately, had neared the end of his long life and went at the best time possible, and I have been provided my familiar cat Sofia for company. As for community shifts... That is simply what happens when you are brought up without emotional safety and availability within your family and so overlook those qualities when making other social connections. Now, thanks to Lucifer and Astaroth, I know the value of that kind of support and comfort and seek out more of it.

I am not going to claim that all "Tower Moments" are so easily justifiable. Having worked in social services, I have certainly heard a lot of horrifying stories where people seem to fall into one misfortune and systemic trap after another. But when you're spiritually connected, you are more likely to find reasons or if not reasons, pathways out. So while avoiding "Tower Moments" in Luciferianism and demonalatry may not be possible, talking to the spirits when you're enduring them always is. As in every case, when you need help it may be hard to ask, but please reach out to those surrounding you.

1Per Faxneld, Satanic Feminism: Lucifer as the Liberator of Woman in Nineteenth-CEntury Culture, p. 3